What do you dip it in? Chicken?
God looking over at the ‘GLOBAL BIBLICAL FLOOD’ button on his control board
He promised to never do that one again.
But he said nothing about a massive gamma ray burst.
Who says he hadn’t already done it a few times already, including the one people wrote about? It’s not like there would be many survivors to share the story … and the ones left alive would definitely be told what they could or couldn’t commit to history.
The fossil record? Of course, that could just be a test of our faith…
If a test of your faith is not rewarded (for punished for your failure) then it was all in your head.
I’d eat it. I would regret it, but I have to know.
I would say that a quote from St. Augustine would be appropriate in this situation:
“Not all wonders are natural; many are devised by man’s ingenuity, many by the craft of demons.”
I’m thinking this is a combination of the latter two. Eating it will make you part of the Army of the Damned.
I’m more worried about my mortal bowels than my immortal soul if I ate that thing.
I think you’re allowed one taste. It’s the second taste that consigns your soul to damnation
I’ve earned eternal damnation for less
Not again.
Why would you regret tasting heaven?
Because I’ll be dead. My organs will organize against the oppression of my brain and I will die.
You worship in your way and let me worship in mine.
What is ranch? I’m English and I don’t have a valid frame of reference for the concept of ranch other than large cattle farm.
A milk/cream based dressing with onion, garlic and dill as the main seasonings, with 4-5 others sprinkled in.
It’s basically the American version of salad cream.
That’s an unfair comparison.
For grandparent:
Ranch is mayonnaise-based, but is savory, with seasonings and plenty of umami. There’s a lot of variation, and IMO the best version is Uncle Dan’s (Amazon).
It’s a cream dressing, so plenty heavy. Often used for dipping stuff. With Uncle Dan’s (which comes as a powder), you mix it with buttermilk and mayo for a dressing; or you mix it with Greek yoghurt (or sour cream) and mayo for a dip.
I disagree that’s it’s an “unfair comparison.” It’s certainly not a 1:1, but to help someone with absolutely no bearing on what ranch dressing is understand, I think it’s a decent shorthand.
It’s like if someone from Mexico asked what sriracha is and I replied, “it’s like the Thai version of Tapatío.” Is it perfect? No, there’s way more nuance, but it gets them most of the way toward understanding.
Fair enough. I’m leery of easy comparisons, because in my mind, they’re such radically different things. It’s like saying a Wiener Schnitzel is basically like American fried chicken. I mean, I guess? They’re both meat, they’re both battered and fried. But they’re drastically different foods.
Shit, I’ll go further: my pet peeve is crème brûlée. It’s egg yolk, heavy cream, sugar and vanilla. That’s it. But every chef at every restaurant has this compulsion to fuck with the recipe; their crème brûlée has lemon, or strawberry, or sage or cayenne or some shit… just leave the fucking recipe alone! Stop trying to be edgy or special! They always have to fuck with the recipe, and it drives me nuts, because it invariably ruins an already perfect recipe. You add shit to a perfect recipe and it can only get less perfect. So, IMO, my crème brûlée, is not like the crème brûlée at that restaurant: not because I’m some awesome chef, but because crème brûlée is a stupid easy recipe that’s almost impossible to screw up… unless you add fucking jalepeño or some such crap.
Ranch contains no mayonnaise. It’s base is buttermilk
Ingredients 1 packet Original Southern Ranch Dressing 2 cups sour cream 2 cups mayonnaise
Uncle Dan’s Classic Ranch Dressing
Ingredients 1 packet of Uncle Dan’s Classic Ranch 2 Cups Buttermilk 2 Cups Mayonnaise
And if you don’t agree that Uncle Dan’s is the pinnacle of ranch dressing, here’s the first search result recipe for homemade ranch dressing; there are 11 ingredients, but the first three are:
Ingredients ▢ 1/2 cup mayonnaise ▢ 1/2 cup sour cream ▢ 1/2 cup buttermilk or regular milk
It’s congealed leprechaun jizz.
Vile.
The description in the image sounds pretty tasty. Although I have no idea what buttermilk is
Love how a spy kids 2 quote from Steve Buscemi hit so hard it’s still circulating the internet twenty two years later.
I’m still waiting for deep fried oil.
Deep fried butter is very close
It’s not deep fried ranch dressing. The image clearly states it is fried ranch flavored cream cheese. Fried cheese isn’t weird.
Even a sauce breaded and deep-fried isn’t that weird; it’s basically what a croquette is.
fried ranch flavored cream cheese
Oh, well never mind. That definitely won’t taste absolutely horrible and is totally not a bad idea for a cheese flavor.
Fried cheese isn’t weird.
Isn’t it, though?
You talk any more shit about mozzarella sticks and there’s gonna be some serious throwdown shenanigans.
Hey, you eat what you like, but separating hot fat from cold fat with some breading and making the cold fat also hot fat is kind of weird.
I had it and I liked. Did I feel a little disgusting having it? Yes. But if someone offers you deep fried ranch at the MN State fair you got to try it.
Honestly that sounds delicious, and you can’t convince me otherwise.
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How is that even possible. You can’t deep fry a liquid.
You take the ranch, and you freeze it in small balls like cheese curds, then remove them, roll them in seasoned flower, drop into room temp ranch, and back into panko. Fry at 350 degrees for 90 seconds.
I just made that all up but that’s what I would try first.
(Hoping you can get it to solidify, remember deep fried ice cream is a thing)
Holy shit. That would work.
Hmm the internet he taught me that throwing icecubes in the deep fryer is a very bad idea
Oh I’m not going to do it, but I have seen people freeze things and deep fry them. I think the trick is, to let it thaw some maybe?
You freeze mozzarella cheese before frying when you make homemade mozzarella sticks. It helps it not leak out before it’s browned on the outside properly.
It’s not exactly a liquid like ranch dressing, so I’m not sure it’d be the same, but it could work
Small ice cube trays would work for the freezing to make it easier
Ranch it up 🤟
