Dish is a revenge best taken out. Or something.
She’s probably a Nurse who drives a Nissan Altima and cheats on everyone of her BF’s. Like a typical nurse.
I see an Altima, I give them their space. Not trying to have my car missing a bumper too.
Good ending: they both were looking for friends outside of relationship
Better ending: they found their third
Best ending: they both found out they weren’t happy in the relationship, moved on, and found their person
Bestest ending: and they continue spotting each other on Tinder while in their new happy relationship.
This bestest ending has levels of sadness. You made me sad. You ruined it.
Please say you are sorry so I can go pick up my new (used) car with good vibes only
I’ll say sorry, but through our Tinder profiles.
Eh, doubt that would be better. Among the Ethically Non-Monogmous, couples looking for a third are considered the worst. They’re invariably looking for a woman to play out the guy’s MFF fantasy. She might be OK with it as a birthday present for him or whatever, but it’s not something she’d choose to do otherwise. If they do manage to find someone, it often doesn’t go well.
I think these couples need to put some cash aside and find an escort.
“looking for a woman to play out the guy’s MFF fantasy”
Sometimes the driving force is a bi-curious woman. What usually happens is that the boyfriend agrees to it because he sees a MDF threesome as being hot, and sapphic love as being less real or serious. Then he freaks out during/after the hookup because of insecurity he feels when seeing his girlfriend enthusiastically making out with a woman. I’ve learned the unpleasant way that it’s no fun to be unicorn hunted.
The worst part is when they try to hide what they’re doing. I once only found out a woman had a boyfriend and that they were looking for a MFF threesome on the third date. Trying to hide their intentions is gross because it shows they have some awareness of how people don’t like being instrumentalised in this way.
Great ending:
I was tired of my lady
We’d been together too long
Like a worn out recording
Of a favorite songSo while she lay there sleepin’
I read the paper in bed
And in the personal columns
There was this letter I readIf you like piña coladas
And gettin’ caught in the rain
If you’re not into yoga
If you have half a brain
If you like makin’ love at midnight
In the dunes on the cape
Then I’m the love that you’ve looked for
Write to me and escapeI didn’t think about my lady
I know that sounds kinda mean
But me and my old lady
Had fallen into the same old dull routineSo I wrote to the paper
Took out a personal ad
And though I’m nobody’s poet
I thought it wasn’t half badYes, I like piña coladas
And gettin’ caught in the rain
I’m not much into health food
I am into champagne
I’ve got to meet you by tomorrow noon
And cut through all this red tape
At a bar called O’Malley’s
Where we’ll plan our escapeSo I waited with high hopes
And she walked in the place
I knew her smile in an instant
I knew the curve of her faceIt was my own lovely lady
And she said, “Oh, it’s you”
Then we laughed for a moment
And I said, “I never knew”“That you like piña coladas
And gettin’ caught in the rain
And the feel of the ocean
And the taste of champagne
If you like making love at midnight
In the dunes on the cape
You’re the lady I’ve looked for
Come with me and escape”If you like piña coladas
And gettin’ caught in the rain
If you’re not into yoga
If you have half a brain
If you like making love at midnight
In the dunes on the cape
I’m the love that you’ve looked for
Write to me and escapeYes, I like piña coladas
And gettin’ caught in the rain
I’m not much into health food
I am into champagne
I’ve got to meet you by tomorrow noon
And cut through all this red tape
At a bar called O’Malley’sIn my case, yes, I was much more desperate for gaming buddies.
My friend was also looking for friends on Tinder. Now he’s divorced.
Twist: they are actually in a polycule.
I keep thinking a polycule is a type of polygon and that it can be mathematically represented in Euclidean and non-Euclidean space.
I was just about to say. Figured it was bait but glad to see it was a joke.
“Do you like piña coladas?”
In the pouring rain?
Plot twist: they look for dates on LinkedIn
LinkedIn and dating sites are hilarious juxtaposition - the opposite people are looking for each other and want to avoid the seekers on each site.
