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Tl;Dr: a meme went around asking women if they’d rather be stuck on an isolated island with a strange man or a strange bear. Most women chose the bear, largely due to the bear being more predictable and easier to deal with than a man inclined to do them harm, which, based on the experience of most women, is a whole lot of men.
Fragile men took this as an attack on all men everywhere and were offended at being “called a predator”.
There’s a pretty good thread in my comment history where I try to address the issue with one such fellow male and their response is about what you’d expect, confirming all the reasons why women chose the strange bear over the strange man
I find this concerning.
That gender disputes reached such an explosive level, that women say they’d rather a bear join them than a man and that man get super upset over this. There’s a little truth in everything. Imagine trying your hardest as a man and still being told ppl prefer a wild animal over you. Imagine knowing as a woman you can’t trust men to the point where you’d prefer a wild and dangerous animal keep you company. And also imagine hating another gender with such a deep passion that a meme becomes a toxic war of insult and discrediting.
I don’t like this timeline, I want a do-over.
I think you hit on something that is a pretty big part of the problem: Men taking it personally. As far as I know, no specific man is mentioned, but a lot seem to insert themselves into the situation.
I try to do my best in life to be a good person, to be a good man, but I completely get why a woman would be worried about being in the middle of nowhere with a strange man, even if that man was me, because they don’t know what that person is capable of.
THIS is EXACTLY the point of the meme. If you understand this, and are a man, you stfu and nod along, or support the women talking about it as a good ally should. The men who don’t understand this are the reply-guys trying to explain how all the women are unreasonable and this is discrimination against men and blah blah blah
Oh so if someone says ‘black people are dangerous thugs, I’d rather encounter a bear than a removed’, it’s all good, a black person shouldn’t take it personally? After all, no specific black person is mentioned. Come on, just be a good ally, stfu and nod.
I am willing to bet many, many people wouldn’t be ok with that, and rightfully so. I know I would not.
That is, at least to me, is both a bit of a strawman and an invalid comparison.
First: The statement “black people are” implies it applies to all of them, or at least the average person, whereas the sentiment that I usually see isn’t that all men are dangerous but rather that some are and it’s difficult, if not impossible, to know which are beforehand.
Second: Men have not been marginalized, discriminated, and systematically oppressed for centuries. People of color have been, at the very least in the west and the countries they’ve colonized.
There’s an additional point to be made here that I feel is relevant: Ethnicity does not inherently infer a large difference in physical characteristics the same way biological sex does. I don’t imagine the strength of an average person varies as much depending on ethnicity as it does depending on biological sex. The average man is much physically stronger than the average woman, in a physical confrontation she’d be at a distinct disadvantage.
“black people” applies to all black people, but “men” doesn’t apply to all men?
That’s honestly an interesting way of thinking.
I’m not sure if you’re trolling or not but “black people are dangerous thugs” is very clearly a racist generalizing statement.
I never claimed the opposite.
Sorry to ping you again, but I want to run a few other things at you, as I find people with the ability to doublethink without blinking absolutely fascinating.
Let’s say, okay, ‘men’ is vague enough that a single individual man should not feel insulted when someone says they’re so bad they would rather get mauled by a bear, because… Reasons idk.
Is ‘women’ vague enough so that it’s just as fine to say, idk, some stereotypical bullshit like ‘women are weak, dumb, and therefore belong in the kitchen’? Should an individual woman not be annoyed after hearing this? Is it not sexist?
Edit/preface: none of this is intended to diminish the very real and valid sense of fear that women may feel towards unknown/untrusted men. I am in no way trying to gatekeep other people’s emotions, nor saying women should “toughen up” or whatever. If my comment was construed as such, I apologize.
It’s a bit of a silly premise, because I’m willing to bet the VAST majority of answerers have never been in close proximity to an actual, honest to god, “hmmm that meatbag looks tasty imma eat its face” bear.
I have. It’ll bring you a clarity of mind and a knowledge of complete vulnerability that you can’t really find outside of other imminently life-threatening situations.
Sure, random dude could be a psycho. But if there’s not much (or any) food on the island, the bear is definitely going to eat you at some point, and there’s nothing you can do about that.
All that said, as a dude myself, I wish there were less shitty men out there. Why can’t we all just fucking respect other humans?
Here’s what you’re missing:
A) it’s much less about whether the bear is a bigger threat and much more about how fucking awful men must treat women for the average woman to go “hmmm… Maybe the bear, tbh?” The fact that it’s even something women have to think about for more than a split second is a dramatic failure of our society. THAT is the point, and any discussion of “well you don’t know about bears then…” is reply-guy shit that misses the entire point and simply serves to further solidify how blind most men are to what goes on in the day to day life of women.
B) An aggressive bear is a known quantity. Is it a threat? Obviously. But it’s a threat that we understand extremely well. Like, a quick Google search will teach you everything you need to know about what to do if you see a bear. But a strange, unknown man? Who the fuck knows. They might seem perfectly pleasant and reasonable, act like your friend, and then flip the fuck out when the woman refuses to sleep with him that night in return for all that manly protection he provided during the day or whatever. THAT is why women pick the bear: a known problem is often preferable to uncertainty that could lead to being extremely vulnerable against a really smart attacker.
Remember, the question wasn’t “would you rather be in a locked room with a bear or a man?” It was “would you rather be stuck on an island with a strange bear or a strange man?”
And to your final question, why can’t we just respect other humans? Great fucking question, but the misogynists should be the ones facing that inquiry, not the people on the internet trying to point you towards them. It may be more uncomfortable and even dangerous to confront them, but don’t take the easy way out by asking victims and their allies to be “nicer” instead
So youve never seen a bear in the woods? Hint: if you see a bear, its probably brown, and you’re in a heap of trouble. Best hope you’re in a car or something like that. They will eat you alive if they can get at you.
Gods, it’s like some people never passed 10th grade English. Sometimes the important part of the text isn’t the literal meaning. There’s like metaphor and hyperbole and shit.
When you meet a bear in the woods, there is a 0% chance they will notice how the situation bears a resemblance to the popular meme and proceed to mansplain about how bears are more dangerous.
This is and has always been the one and only reason women choose the bear. But one question yet eludes us: how did the cycle start?
If youre so suicidal youd rather to be eaten alive than a chance to be condescended to, theres a problem.
If the biggest threat you pose to women is possible condescension, and you don’t understand why this is a meme, then maybe you’re one of the good guys.
Tbh, my bigger question is if you’re in bear country, why arent you carrying a big gun? Be prepared!
The whole thing just reinforces a helpless victim mentality, and it irritates me. Its misogynistic. If you’re that worried, buy a gun, learn to use it safely, and carry it. To me, this is on the same level of not having a fire extinguisher or toilet plunger. I just dont understand people who refuse basic defense. Did they watch an old western and see the damsel get tied to the railroad tracks and get the wrong message?
Some people think “just buy a fire extinguisher”. Other people think “why not prevent the fire in the first place?” And a few people think “I prefer defense in depth. Mitigate the fires to the degree possible and keep a fire extinguisher nearby for emergencies.”
Only one of these people has it right. Can you guess which one?
Dude was going around asking if theyd rather meet a man or a bear in the woods. There isnt much hidden meaning behind it, its not a 4deep2me tumblr post
I didn’t follow any of this, it was forced down my throat :
Random Twitter woman says she’d rather be with a bear than a man while in the woods.
Some men gets angry that she’d rather be with a dengerous wild beast rather than a man.
the Woman double down. Other women agree with her.
it becomes a meme. Mostly by men making fun of how it would end if she really meets a bear or making jokes about how even the bear wouldn’t want to be near her.
People who don’t understand why she would pick the bear don’t deserve bears.
As a dude i prefer a bear… if I can’t choose my wife
Same, this comment section is an amazing collection of why
have we finally full circled to the gay men aspect of bears?
Or are we still waiting on that?
Of course women want to be lost in a forest with a fabulous hairy gay man
i can’t think of someone who wouldn’t to be honest. Would be a rather amusing time.
