• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I don’t have a lot of money. What I do have is a very particular set of skills. Skills I have aquired over a lifetime that make me a problem for people like you. If you return my wifes money, and take her off your list, that will be the end of it. I will not pursue you. If you refuse, I will look for you. I WILL find you. And I will HACK you.

    …uh, digitally I mean. I’ll hack your computers. Not like with a machette or anything. Oh my god, could you imagine, going all Jason Voorhees when someone hacks his wife??? Imagine all the blood!!! There would be sooooo much blood if you chopped of a scammers head!!! What were talking about again? Oh yeah!!!

    Doon doon doon doon

    Chhhh chhhh chhhh chhhh!!!

    And then I just hack you to bits…

    Can you imagine???

    No, really. Try to imagine it.

    Just imagine it!!!

    IMAGINE ALL THE BLOOD!!!

    Ok, I kept you on the phone long enough. I’ve hacked your computer, traced the call, and alerted the police.

    Byyyeeeeee!!!