• Stamets@startrek.website
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    1 year ago

    Then congratulations on having a healthy childhood. I sure as hell didn’t. For me I will only ever see it as an obligation. My mother used them as ways to control me. Now I just don’t like getting gifts because it makes me think that person is going to hurt me.

    • vithigar@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      I mean… that still sounds awful. Just through no fault of your own. Which is arguably worse. Or at least more sympathetic.

      • Stamets@startrek.website
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        1 year ago

        Yeah that’s all I mean. Not everyone purposefully views gift giving like that. I had to do so as a simple defense mechanism.

    • dlok@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Yeah I used to get shamed for not buying presents when I was a teenager and didn’t have a job and I find it really mentally taxing to figure out what to buy people… people who are good gift givers are capable of doing so without it hurting themselves financially too much imo. when I had a job I found myself over compensating by buying people expensive electronics which wasn’t sustainable if I was going to save up and move out so the whole thing just stresses me out.