• hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Man I’d hate being a young man today.

    Guys are put in a position where they have to put themselves out there and face rejection. it’s obviously becoming harder to connect with women given that a larger and larger percentage of men under 21 report being virgins every year.

    Then as a result of being in this sad but common position you get told that it’s all your fault and you’re a shitty person.

    I think I would have just ended up killing myself if I was a teenager today.

    • WalrusDragonOnABike@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Feel like a higher rate of virgins could be a good sign that people aren’t feeling pressured to do things they don’t want to.

      • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Virginity among women hasn’t climbed in nearly the same way, most men 21 and under also report having never been in a relationship, young men’s mental health has declined more than any other demographic, and incel culture seems to be on the rise.

        I realllly don’t think this is a good thing.

        • WalrusDragonOnABike@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          Women were under the opposite pressure: to stay a virgin. Also, some people don’t want to be in relationships. In middle/high school, a lot of dating was obviously performative and they were only “dating” because of social pressures to do so. I’m no longer a teen, so I have no clue what the pressures are now. It could be the pressures are still there and more people are failing to meet them (hence, the incel community). I know they’re not completely gone, because I still sometimes hear about things like people dating because they want to have someone for prom or whatever.

          Given how complex mental health is, trying to tie it to just one thing that correlates with it is not very convincing. Likewise, even if incel culture is on the rise, it seems much more reasonable to connect that to the growth of the internet and the niche communities it allows to fester and become visible.

            • WalrusDragonOnABike@kbin.social
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              1 year ago

              There’s obviously issues. I grew up in a time that pressured people into doing things like dating and having sex they didn’t want. Real issue men face. Are you dismissing that issue?

              • hesusingthespiritbomb@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                I’m not saying that issue doesn’t exist, I’m saying your implication that the rise in men who have never been in relationships is a good thing is ridiculous.

                First, women are in a relationship at a much higher percentage in younger age groups. The idea that women love to be in relationships but men don’t is straight up sexism on your part.

                There are also huge reports of loneliness and isolation among men. There are reports of a significant minority of men being bitter about not being in relationships or having sex. It’s clearly a big deal.

                You are arguing in bad faith in an attempt to dismiss a real issue men face.

                • WalrusDragonOnABike@kbin.social
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                  1 year ago

                  You say it doesn’t exist, but you promoted the anti-virgin and anti-single norms (whether you believe in them or not) and try to tie complex multifaceted issues like depression and loneliness to your single pet issue. You say I’m acting in bad faith, but I take personal issue with the ideas you are promoting incidental to your main point (which isn’t something I’m really responding to at all).